Its been two months since I started writing this blog, and, so far I can see that its been a resounding success. I mean all the readers have been tremendously encouraging. The sheer volume of comments in each post is over-whelming (two in the last and four in the one before). I have been so inspired by my own posts, that I myself have put in 50% of those comments.
The feedback i have recieved in person has been even better. I owe a lot to my room-mates here. They have been very encouragin on this front. Devasssy said, "the other day, I was so bored, I read all your posts that were written in English. It took me a whole 30 seconds. There were the google ads and Chickmaglur trip photos. Couldnt really understand much else"
Funda, not to be outdone, din take long before adding, "Dude, its very true what you write in your posts. 'What am I talking about?'. I dont have any idea, and I dont think many of the other reader's would disagree." (P.S. : This comment was on the post i deleted last week. So, no use searching for it.)
RGC, (ah yes our smart and handsome hero), as is characteristic of him puts it very subtly, "I came to your blog, read one para and clicked on the link to that chick's blog." Dear, RGC, I appreciate your honesty and frankness, but, buddy, you dont have to be completely honest all of the time.
In other news, after a very gruellin 2 months continuous at the office( weekends included), I am finally at HOME SWEET HOME. Before coming home, I did the requisite little shopping from FORUM mall. 3 families of eagerly waiting cousins, who prefer to address me as 'Chocolate evide' (read as Where r the chocolates'),every time I come home, somehow add to the in-evitability of this pit stop. The sheer volume of eye candy didnt also do much to cut down the shopping time to half.
After about an hour of roaming, it came to dawn upon me that none of the girls were actually gonna come up to me and say, "Hi.. I have been noticing you for a while. If you dont mind, would you like to join me for a coffee?". Realising this, i headed straight for the bus stop.
The trip home was very exciting. I couldnt have slept if i wanted to. The guy sitting next to me gave me a as-pleasant-as-poison-ivy-on-christmas kinda smile. 4 years in Calicut(famous for its as-happy-as-gay culture) had taught me that shutting my eyes even for a moment could prove to be a dangerous gamble. The film they had put on wasnt exactly helping the cause... Somehow, 3 guys chasing a frog that supposedly helps them identify, which is the witch out of the two actresses on screen -hmmmm- not my cup of tea.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Friday, April 13, 2007
It has begun
There is a guy in the opposite cubicle playing music at high volume. I see two team mates, both head banging - only in very different ways. I know one of them is enjoying the music. The other, well, currently his goal seems to be punch a hole thru his desk.
RGM aka xIOnIx better known as me belongs to the extremely rare breed of human's called the people pleaser. Now, this breed of humans have a very peculiar problem. They need every human being on Earth to like them. No, they cant have exception's to this rule . It hurts. It hurts their pride and even more so(for reasons beyond the paranormal) their concsience. Their deepest fears measure two in number -
a) Diversity .........
b) Politics ..........
Para 1 is a classic example of Deep Fear (a). Deep Fear (b) is something i had hoped i would never be involved in. Even in college i tried to keep away from it, atleast whatever little of it was present in a college, where politics were 'supposedly' banned.
Apparently or so I have come to learn, this isnt part of the algorithm the big man upstairs has prepared for us. The master plan includes a step (with no conditional escape sequence) which says that we all one day have to face our greatest fears. The past week for the most part, were filled with negotiations, attempted match-fixings, if i dare say b/w me and the Almighty. I might have known that all the tricks up my sleeve + two of my most powerful trump card's would do nothing to mould his mood. The master plan did not have a flaw. Hence, it could not be broken. It could not be shaped thru mere mortal yearnings.
Ahhhhhh!!!! Enuf of the philosophiticsm(dont look it up on Webster's... I just made up that word). Let's have a brief look into what I am talking about shall we. I am not sure if many of you remember, but, about a few months ago, I was drawn into the trap of "the project that should not be named". It strikes fear into the heart of engineer's as Lord Voldemort( I can take his name... I 'm not a muggle) in the heart of non-muggles. Every other engineer who had worked on this project had either lost sanity(the lucky ones) or left the company within nine months of starting off(regular nightmares still haunt these poor souls). The management realises that it would be best to draw someone naive into the clutches of this monster.
Said one clever manager to the other, "Why not trap that nut(read as poor little me) who keeps wandering from cubicle to cubicle and once to often for comfort into the HR section?. Its not like he is gonna get a job anywhere else.He cant run away." Heinous laugh follows.
During the course of the next week, the manager arms him with what he thinks is more equipment than he will ever require for this mission.
Manager:"Now you remember whatever i told you. There is a little group of, well, not-so-nice people who live on the other side of this mountain. We call them vampires. They come out only at night, so, you will need this torch."
PHooL(PHoor Little Naive Me): "Hmmmmm"
Manager(chooses his words carefully): "They should not be infinite in number. So you should not have any trouble eliminating their entire race"
PHooL:"Cool"
Manager: "Here is your metal cross, garlic spray, 5 silver bullets, this rust-coloured(or so he claims) gun. Use ANY one of these and he should dissappear into a cloud of smoke"
PHool:"Will, I really need all this?"
Manager: "Actually, no. But, since this is a first for you, we want to make things really easy for you" (Smiles - he must have been practising for a long time now to perfect that)
"Oh and here. You can take this wooden stake too. Mite come in handy"
PHooL:"Wow ... geee.... golly" (now totally overwhelmed and at a loss for words)
Our hero sets off in the direction of his mission, fully convinced, that truly there would be none in this world more luckier than him. OOooooooooooooooooooh, how naive could he be. Oblivious was he to the fact, that these so called vampires feasted on human blood. Oblivious was he to the fact that these monsters could fly. Oblivious, was he to the fact that these vile creations of time did not have souls. Their actions were not bound by conscience. Their wrath knew no limits.
He didnt understand the deep stench around him. Why didnt someone tell him that it was from the deep shit he was walking into?
For four months, our hero walked through the shit. Being the smart man he was, it didnt take him more than a month to figure out that he was in Deep Shit. Its viscosity just thick enough to keep him stuck in it,while not permittin him to sink in its sins.
**************--------------------> Into present day
A couple of days ago, I recieved this mail. Actually it was a chain of mails. Summarized, its contents translated as follows. (My) Manager's manager tells senior executives (product development incharge and VP of India operations) that he would like to give a demonstration of the (seemingly) excellent work that has been carried out so far. Wow, talk about opportunity coming and slapping you hard in your face. "Wake up boy... Its time to cash in".. Kisi ne sahin kaha hai, "Dene waala jab bhi deta, deta chappad phaadke"
Well, not that good, but, good enuf anyway. I mean presentation with the big shots. Ever come across a shorter foot path to success. As one would have expected, envy (check it out) and success do come hand in hand. Suddenly, our hero is caught in the midst of a political debacle.
Salient features of debacle:
a) New news, manager to give presentation to big shots (after I give him and his immediate manager a presentation on all the work I carried out)
b) I have no issues with point (a)(manager is a very nice and helpful guy), but, what makes it interesting is that, my mentor for the task (apparently:sworn enemy of the manager) hates the fact that manager dearest gets to take credit for the same, after him and me do all the swimmin thru deep shit.
c) Further confusions caused when people come and tell mentor, "Dude, that new chap Rohit has done a gr8 job with that ePO work na"
Harmless sentence, when read by a third party. But when read as, "Manager and Rohit make project a huge success, without ANY other external help", well, then it becomes a problem.
How i will convey to the chap, that I am without a doubt eternally grateful for all his help... I do not know. When put in a pickle where i have to choose between manager and his sworn enemy, what do I do... I do not know... Interesting isnt it... Ah well, "Que serai serai...."
Oh yeah... and here is something interesting that I came across in a blog recently...Am sure a lot of you will have valuable comments on the same :))
RGM aka xIOnIx better known as me belongs to the extremely rare breed of human's called the people pleaser. Now, this breed of humans have a very peculiar problem. They need every human being on Earth to like them. No, they cant have exception's to this rule . It hurts. It hurts their pride and even more so(for reasons beyond the paranormal) their concsience. Their deepest fears measure two in number -
a) Diversity .........
b) Politics ..........
Para 1 is a classic example of Deep Fear (a). Deep Fear (b) is something i had hoped i would never be involved in. Even in college i tried to keep away from it, atleast whatever little of it was present in a college, where politics were 'supposedly' banned.
Apparently or so I have come to learn, this isnt part of the algorithm the big man upstairs has prepared for us. The master plan includes a step (with no conditional escape sequence) which says that we all one day have to face our greatest fears. The past week for the most part, were filled with negotiations, attempted match-fixings, if i dare say b/w me and the Almighty. I might have known that all the tricks up my sleeve + two of my most powerful trump card's would do nothing to mould his mood. The master plan did not have a flaw. Hence, it could not be broken. It could not be shaped thru mere mortal yearnings.
Ahhhhhh!!!! Enuf of the philosophiticsm(dont look it up on Webster's... I just made up that word). Let's have a brief look into what I am talking about shall we. I am not sure if many of you remember, but, about a few months ago, I was drawn into the trap of "the project that should not be named". It strikes fear into the heart of engineer's as Lord Voldemort( I can take his name... I 'm not a muggle) in the heart of non-muggles. Every other engineer who had worked on this project had either lost sanity(the lucky ones) or left the company within nine months of starting off(regular nightmares still haunt these poor souls). The management realises that it would be best to draw someone naive into the clutches of this monster.
Said one clever manager to the other, "Why not trap that nut(read as poor little me) who keeps wandering from cubicle to cubicle and once to often for comfort into the HR section?. Its not like he is gonna get a job anywhere else.He cant run away." Heinous laugh follows.
During the course of the next week, the manager arms him with what he thinks is more equipment than he will ever require for this mission.
Manager:"Now you remember whatever i told you. There is a little group of, well, not-so-nice people who live on the other side of this mountain. We call them vampires. They come out only at night, so, you will need this torch."
PHooL(PHoor Little Naive Me): "Hmmmmm"
Manager(chooses his words carefully): "They should not be infinite in number. So you should not have any trouble eliminating their entire race"
PHooL:"Cool"
Manager: "Here is your metal cross, garlic spray, 5 silver bullets, this rust-coloured(or so he claims) gun. Use ANY one of these and he should dissappear into a cloud of smoke"
PHool:"Will, I really need all this?"
Manager: "Actually, no. But, since this is a first for you, we want to make things really easy for you" (Smiles - he must have been practising for a long time now to perfect that)
"Oh and here. You can take this wooden stake too. Mite come in handy"
PHooL:"Wow ... geee.... golly" (now totally overwhelmed and at a loss for words)
Our hero sets off in the direction of his mission, fully convinced, that truly there would be none in this world more luckier than him. OOooooooooooooooooooh, how naive could he be. Oblivious was he to the fact, that these so called vampires feasted on human blood. Oblivious was he to the fact that these monsters could fly. Oblivious, was he to the fact that these vile creations of time did not have souls. Their actions were not bound by conscience. Their wrath knew no limits.
He didnt understand the deep stench around him. Why didnt someone tell him that it was from the deep shit he was walking into?
For four months, our hero walked through the shit. Being the smart man he was, it didnt take him more than a month to figure out that he was in Deep Shit. Its viscosity just thick enough to keep him stuck in it,while not permittin him to sink in its sins.
**************--------------------> Into present day
A couple of days ago, I recieved this mail. Actually it was a chain of mails. Summarized, its contents translated as follows. (My) Manager's manager tells senior executives (product development incharge and VP of India operations) that he would like to give a demonstration of the (seemingly) excellent work that has been carried out so far. Wow, talk about opportunity coming and slapping you hard in your face. "Wake up boy... Its time to cash in".. Kisi ne sahin kaha hai, "Dene waala jab bhi deta, deta chappad phaadke"
Well, not that good, but, good enuf anyway. I mean presentation with the big shots. Ever come across a shorter foot path to success. As one would have expected, envy (check it out) and success do come hand in hand. Suddenly, our hero is caught in the midst of a political debacle.
Salient features of debacle:
a) New news, manager to give presentation to big shots (after I give him and his immediate manager a presentation on all the work I carried out)
b) I have no issues with point (a)(manager is a very nice and helpful guy), but, what makes it interesting is that, my mentor for the task (apparently:sworn enemy of the manager) hates the fact that manager dearest gets to take credit for the same, after him and me do all the swimmin thru deep shit.
c) Further confusions caused when people come and tell mentor, "Dude, that new chap Rohit has done a gr8 job with that ePO work na"
Harmless sentence, when read by a third party. But when read as, "Manager and Rohit make project a huge success, without ANY other external help", well, then it becomes a problem.
How i will convey to the chap, that I am without a doubt eternally grateful for all his help... I do not know. When put in a pickle where i have to choose between manager and his sworn enemy, what do I do... I do not know... Interesting isnt it... Ah well, "Que serai serai...."
Oh yeah... and here is something interesting that I came across in a blog recently...Am sure a lot of you will have valuable comments on the same :))
Friday, April 6, 2007
Google tried to frame me!!!!
They say a picture is worth a thousand words. Well, if there is any truth to that saying, what you are gonna see today will be nothin short of a novel. How, i would luv to go into detail about the backdrop, the contexts and the backstage drama that surrounded these 'non-incidental-works of art'. Unfortunately, neither lady luck, nor the mistress of time seems to be in the mood to shower their special blessings upon me and there is just so much piling up on me that there mite just be an avalanche breakdown (kindly excuse the lingo -> After joinin software, the days of muggin up electronic jargon seem like good ol days to me.... wow... there is somethin
neither I nor any student of Hema Rani wud have ever thought they did say.. )
pseudo Thousand word instance 1:
When i blocked my blog a couple of days ago, thousands* of you asked me what happened. There were rumors, there were assumptions. There was a bandh in TN followed by one in AP. CNN IBN said, "Sachin slams Greg". Ya, I know it doesnt bear any relevance, but, you shud have seen the look on your face :-). You see, about a week ago I added google adsense on this page. About two days ago, the account got approved. The idea is that 'the all powerful google' -kindly ignore the volumes of sarcasm in that phrasing- puts RELEVANT ads on your page based on its contents. Well, I will let the picture do all the talking.
Now, I will admit that the whole idea of google ads was to generate revenue. But, that is definitely not the buisness I had in mind. For all the guys who had sent me well wishes for the same and added that they would come to support my buisness in whatever way they could, thank you for the genuine concern and 'guileless' intent but I guess I will have to dissappoint u. For all the gals(and Devassy) who had sent in applications, sorry... No openings
pseudo Thousand word instance 2, 3 and 4:
Dale Carnegie (renowned author and Leadership instructor), says that the there is a desire in every human that surpasses both his primal and carnal
instincts and that is the feeling of importance. Care to disagree? I am sure you will have different thoughts once you see what some people will do
to get anywhere within the frame outer ridges of the photo. I am sure that Orkut has done nothing but compound the same. :D
pseudo Thousand word instance 5:
Now dats wat i call culinary art:
If you are regular reader here, you probably have been wondering for a while now, what is that Dosa my manager keeps referring to. In the very very likely event that you have not read beyond the topic
or Date of the blog, you are definitely wondering what that grotesque image loaded just below is. I wont keep you all in suspense for much longer folks. This is it... However hard, it may be for you to believe
what you see below is (or atleast was intended to be) a DOSA. I guess this once and for all shatters the myth that there is some act of genius that eludes 'THE RGC'
If he can do this without using any toxic ingredients, well, there really isnt much else he cant do. Is there???
pseudo Thousand word instance 6:
Oh yeah, and we also went to Mysore last weekend. The trip was very ;;;;;;;;interesting;;;;;;;; and there is lots to write abt there also.. :)
* maybe divided by 20 and then further divided by 5. I guess you would have to divide by 5 once more to get the rite figure. Thanks Anphy
and Meera for ur genuine concern *sniff* (tears in my eyes rite now)
neither I nor any student of Hema Rani wud have ever thought they did say.. )
pseudo Thousand word instance 1:
When i blocked my blog a couple of days ago, thousands* of you asked me what happened. There were rumors, there were assumptions. There was a bandh in TN followed by one in AP. CNN IBN said, "Sachin slams Greg". Ya, I know it doesnt bear any relevance, but, you shud have seen the look on your face :-). You see, about a week ago I added google adsense on this page. About two days ago, the account got approved. The idea is that 'the all powerful google' -kindly ignore the volumes of sarcasm in that phrasing- puts RELEVANT ads on your page based on its contents. Well, I will let the picture do all the talking.
Now, I will admit that the whole idea of google ads was to generate revenue. But, that is definitely not the buisness I had in mind. For all the guys who had sent me well wishes for the same and added that they would come to support my buisness in whatever way they could, thank you for the genuine concern and 'guileless' intent but I guess I will have to dissappoint u. For all the gals(and Devassy) who had sent in applications, sorry... No openings
pseudo Thousand word instance 2, 3 and 4:
Dale Carnegie (renowned author and Leadership instructor), says that the there is a desire in every human that surpasses both his primal and carnal
instincts and that is the feeling of importance. Care to disagree? I am sure you will have different thoughts once you see what some people will do
to get anywhere within the frame outer ridges of the photo. I am sure that Orkut has done nothing but compound the same. :D
pseudo Thousand word instance 5:
Now dats wat i call culinary art:
If you are regular reader here, you probably have been wondering for a while now, what is that Dosa my manager keeps referring to. In the very very likely event that you have not read beyond the topic
or Date of the blog, you are definitely wondering what that grotesque image loaded just below is. I wont keep you all in suspense for much longer folks. This is it... However hard, it may be for you to believe
what you see below is (or atleast was intended to be) a DOSA. I guess this once and for all shatters the myth that there is some act of genius that eludes 'THE RGC'
If he can do this without using any toxic ingredients, well, there really isnt much else he cant do. Is there???
pseudo Thousand word instance 6:
Oh yeah, and we also went to Mysore last weekend. The trip was very ;;;;;;;;interesting;;;;;;;; and there is lots to write abt there also.. :)
* maybe divided by 20 and then further divided by 5. I guess you would have to divide by 5 once more to get the rite figure. Thanks Anphy
and Meera for ur genuine concern *sniff* (tears in my eyes rite now)
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